Don’t Let Depression Win...

You Want to Cry and Don’t Know Why

The alarm goes off and the depression count down begins. What can I delay today? Who can I cancel? Where can I delegate? All you want is your pillow. When you look in the mirror, you count the flaws and loathe what you see. The inner diatribe is sharp and unrelenting. This is depression and it makes working, playing, learning and parenting almost impossible. You suffer because you lack motivation. You are guilty because you can’t mobilize. You want to cry and you don’t know why. It makes no sense. You barely recognize yourself.

It Makes No Sense

You would do anything to feel better, and you’ve probably tried all of the usual fixes: omega-3s, gym memberships, yoga, meditation, affirmations and “being positive.” Self-help books and rock anthems might give you a momentary emotional boost, but perhaps the gray cloud of depression always manages to descend once again. Your job performance may be suffering, your loved ones are perhaps bewildered and you are likely worn out by the effort it takes to pay the bills, get out of bed in the morning or even tie your shoelaces. There’s a way out of this, but in your current state, hope has perhaps migrated south for the season.

It’s not your fault

Depression treatment also questions the high bars individuals set for themselves. Is it fair? Does it make sense? When patients learn to examine their wishes for perfection, they learn to weed out the goals that don’t matter anymore and keep only the important ones. Once the backbreaking ideals are retired, rest and relaxation can find a foothold. Pleasure and connection are right behind. With the help of counselling you can learn about your vulnerabilities to hurt, guilt, shame, and loneliness. You can recognise that you are backsliding into depression in a more timely manner and intercede with exceptional self-care.

I can barely get through my day

Yes. I know. Another obligation. Another place to be. You are already so burdened by your illness that you can’t imagine that someone could lighten the load you are already carrying. The hopeful part of you is reading this and searching for relief. At the same time, something powerful (and probably old) is working like acid on your hope. Think of taking the power of the sneering, hateful part and aiming all that energy at acquiring something you want instead of at your most vulnerable self.

Don’t Let Depression Win

Article by Mary Mcilroy Counselling Services.